Seeing the image below recently got me thinking again about how I am as a person. I’ve always considered myself to be primarily introverted though this quote made me realise that I can be both introverted and extroverted, depending on the situation.
I suppose I want to find a mid-point between the two – that would work well for me. A hybrid life, on my own terms. To be quiet when I choose to be. To have time to read, listen to music, play my guitars, walk Rosie (my Jack Russell terrier, if you weren’t aware), watch some TV, spend quality time with my wife and daughter. These are all times when I’m quite introverted and it suits me just fine. I’m very comfortable in my own company or with very small groups.
I tend to dislike busy and bustling scenarios in general, though I can feel comfortable in certain situations, such as a night out with friends, large gatherings with people I know and trust, and city trips where I’m just ‘one of the crowd’. I can also veer towards being extroverted if I feel it’s absolutely essential, such as performing live. I must admit, there are times when I feel a little fraudulent doing this as deep down I know it isn’t ‘the real me’, but it has to be done to allow me to continue doing something which I love.
I don’t know the science behind this, which is probably just as well as I don’t want this to turn into a lengthy, meandering post. I do want to share this viewpoint though, primarily for 2 reasons. Firstly, there may be others out there who feel the same way and think it’s a little odd (as I did for a while, though I’ve now realised that it really isn’t (to my mind, at least)). Secondly, and I hope this doesn’t happen too often, but if you meet me and think I’m quite quiet or reserved, chances are I’ll be in a situation which I’m not fully comfortable with. If that’s the case, please don’t take it personally. Better still, strike up a conversation about it. I’m always happy to talk about anything I write about here – I am in a relatively comfortable place when doing so. But I’m always striving to breakout of that comfort zone and challenge myself, which isn’t always easy. So, I will quite frequently place myself in situations where I must overcome that introversion; it’s just that this can take some time (and nervousness!) to adapt to.
As always, thanks for reading, stay safe, and please do try to be kind to others and to yourself.
Best wishes and take care.