I’m hoping someone will be able to convince me otherwise, but I genuinely do believe this to be true, at least in the western world (the UK, western Europe, the US etc). And much of it is down to phone addiction…

I’ve thought this for a while, though some things I observed during a couple of holidays abroad this year really highlighted the extent of the issue. Firstly, I spent a few days in Budapest in February, with my wife and daughter. We stayed in a really nice hotel, with a small but lovely dining room. Every morning the 3 of us went for breakfast. Every morning, the 3 of us chatted about the previous day, what we intended doing that day, and anything else of interest. Without doubt, this was really valuable family time. The dining room contained around 15 tables; some set up for 4 people, but at least half of those were set up for 2. Every morning, most of those tables for 2 were taken and every morning, at least half of them were used by couples who were glued to their phone screens. Every now and then, some would stop to talk, though, in the main, the majority of their time there was spent staring at a screen. Very little conversation. Very little interaction with the person they were with. Very little living in the moment (i.e. enjoying someone else’s company; appreciating the surroundings; appreciating the lovely food etc). This happened every morning we were there, without fail.

Then, during early August, we took a holiday in Lanzarote. A nice hotel in a lovely resort, where a short 5-minute stroll took us to the seafront. There is a beautiful promenade there, with many shops, bars and restaurants. Walking here at any time, day or night, highlighted a similar problem. Within the bars and restaurants, there were many tables where couples were looking at their phones, rather than enjoying each other’s company. There were children glued to phones and tablet screens. There were people walking along the promenade, close to banging into others because they were staring at the device in their hands, rather than looking ahead. All this in an absolutely stunning setting too, when there is so much to marvel at if people just stop for a minute and consider the beauty right in front of them.

These examples aren’t confined to trips abroad though. Take a look around any time you head to a restaurant or bar close to home, or when you use public transport. It’s the same here – people glued to devices all the time (when they’re not using them to hold loudspeaker conversations on that is, without headphones or earbuds, particularly on buses or trains,  though I’ll save that rant for another day…).  The everyday example which really makes me laugh (and I have to laugh, otherwise I’d cry…) is during the interval at live concerts or shows. I watch a lot of live comedy, music and shows, and it’s always the same when there is an interval or break between acts – there are two mad dashes; one for the bar and another for phones. Disclaimer – I’m no saint – I also do this all the time. It’s crazy. People literally pounce on their phones the moment a performance ends, as if some earth-shattering, life-changing event will have taken place during the 60-minutes beforehand and we need to be right on top of it. Faces throughout entire venues light up almost simultaneously. The sad thing is most of us are now hardwired to act in this way. It’s as natural as eating, sleeping, and being British and complaining about the weather.

And therein lies the problem. We are all programmed in that way these days, whether we like it or not, and I just don’t see it changing. I saw this succinct yet brilliant summary recently – eye-opening and frightening in equal measure:

Mobile phones. There is so much which is good about them, but also so much which is bad. We are completely reliant on them. In saying all this, I must admit that I’m not a paragon of virtue here. I’m as addicted to my phone as the rest of us, and I’m battling that each day. My phone has a usage tracker which provides a weekly update on the number of hours I’ve spent on it each day. Here’s a crazy / insane / mindboggling sentence – my target usage is 3hrs per day, and I struggle achieving that. Three bloody hours…  Admittedly, that time covers ever single minute my phone screen is on, so, whilst it includes internet, social media, and e-mail usage, it also includes things such as monitoring my health stats, using music and podcast apps, accessing my photo gallery, using the calculator for work, referring to my to-do list, and many other things. There is a delicate balance to also consider – there are many positives to what our phones can do for us, though there are so many negative elements too. And, let’s be honest about this, surely much of our phone usage is spent aimlessly surfing the internet and/or scrolling through social media? That is difficult to change – it’s addictive – but does it really need to be done when we’re at a restaurant with someone, or enjoying the company of others during a night out? Have we really, genuinely, lost the ability to talk? To find something interesting to chat about with each other? Surely we’re not at that point yet? Surely we can keep our phones in our pocket, or in a different room, for at least an hour or two?

If anyone is at all interested, this short (6 minutes) video is well worth a watch, and includes a few really useful tips to try and reduce our reliance on phones.

No wonder there are so many mental health issues affecting a huge number of people these days. It all seems pretty bloody bleak to me. Someone please convince me otherwise. Please reassure me that we’re not turning into a nation of zombies, all of us heading to Hell in a handcart but too busy staring down at our screens to notice…

Apologies for the bleak nature of this week’s post! I’ll hopefully get back to some more positive content next week…

Best wishes.

Mick